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Our Normal Criteria For Choosing a Restaurant

By Andy on 6 October 2004 the wee hours
Category: The Boys

Saturday was a good day. I know today is Wednesday, so just bear with me. I’ve been running way behind on posting to my journal lately, so this should come as no surprise.

On Saturday, Tiffany and I got to go on a date. We actually got to choose a restaurant based on normal restaurant-choosing criteria and not parents-of-a-toddler criteria. What I mean is, the restaurant we chose didn’t have a spiral slide.

Normally the criteria we use is as follows:

  • We prefer a restaurant that has a lot of background noise. In fact, the nosier the better. Kids running around uncontrollably? Even better. Unless the kid is ours, that is. See, we know that people in that restaurant understand. In some small way, we are together in the trenches fighting the same battle over sippy cups and runny noses.
  • We prefer a restaurant that’s not spotless. Furthermore, we actually feel a little better about the place if we see other people tossing food on the floor. It makes us feel a little cozier.
  • For dinner entertainment, we prefer a spiral slide, a ball pit, and a snaky crawl-through tunnel to a guy in a tux playing a violin.
  • We prefer restaurants with crayons and neat coloring placemats for kids.
  • We prefer restaurants where we can comfortably wear clothes that have blobs of snot on the shoulders.
  • We prefer restaurants where the staff feels uninhibited to come roaring out with a vacuum cleaner during the meal. For those restaurants we frequent, they actually begin cranking up their vacuum cleaners as soon as they see us arrive.

But on Saturday, we got to choose a restaurant based on normal criteria. Tiffany’s best friend Sarah demanded that she keep Caleb, so we could go out. We chose Cabo Grande. It’s a neat little Mexican restaurant in downtown Fort Worth. Taking advantage of the first weekend in the 70 degree range, we sat out on their patio, talked about our life (and other peoples lives too), ate fajitas, had lots of fun, and of course were back home by 7:30pm. Why so early? I guess we are just programmed that way now.

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